Of all the decisions you make when planning a wedding, the DJ is the one most couples underestimate — until the day itself.
The venue gets months of research. The dress gets months more. The DJ often gets a quick Google search and a price check a few weeks before the date. And then couples spend their reception wondering why the dancefloor is half empty and their nan left at 9pm.
I’ve been doing this for 30 years. I’ve played at weddings where everything clicked and the room was still going at midnight. I’ve also watched from the side-lines at venues where another DJ was struggling, and seen exactly what goes wrong when the wrong person is behind the decks. Here’s what I’ve learned.
Your DJ is directing your reception — not just playing music
From the moment your guests walk in to the last song of the night, your DJ is shaping the energy of the room. Every track choice, every transition, every announcement, every moment of silence — all of it is either working for you or against you.
The music sets the tone during the drinks reception before guests even sit down. It carries people through the meal. It brings them to their feet for the first dance. It keeps them there until the venue turns the lights on. A DJ who understands that responsibility approaches the job completely differently to one who’s just running through a playlist.
What separates good DJs from great ones
Reading the room in real time. A playlist is just a starting point. What matters is the ability to feel what’s happening on the dancefloor and respond to it — knowing when to push the energy, when to pull it back, and how to bring people back after a lull. This is a skill that only comes with experience. You can’t fake it.
Managing the timeline without you noticing. Wedding timings never run perfectly. Photos overrun, speeches go long, guests take their time finding seats. A professional DJ absorbs those changes and adjusts without it ever becoming your problem. You should be able to hand over the evening and not think about it again.
Handling the technical side completely. Microphone feedback during the speeches, sound that doesn’t reach the back of the room, music that cuts out mid-first-dance — these things happen when the wrong equipment is used or the setup isn’t done properly. Professional kit, properly set up, with backup available if anything fails. That’s the standard you should expect.
Communicating clearly before the day. The planning process matters as much as the performance. A DJ who asks the right questions — about your music, your guests, your timeline, your must-plays and do-not-plays — is one who’ll deliver what you actually want rather than what they feel like playing.
Red flags worth knowing about
In 30 years I’ve seen a lot of how this industry works. These are the warning signs worth taking seriously when you’re making enquiries:
- No contract or a very vague one — this is how couples get let down at the last minute with no comeback
- Slow or unclear communication during the booking process — it doesn’t get better on the day
- Unable to tell you specifically what equipment they use or whether they carry backups
- No evidence of wedding experience specifically — club DJs and wedding DJs are different disciplines
- Reviews that mention music but say nothing about professionalism, communication or timing
Questions worth asking before you book
When you speak to a DJ — whether it’s me or anyone else — these are the questions that will tell you the most:
Can I see your contract before I commit? A professional will have one ready.
What happens if you’re ill on the day? A good answer involves a named backup, not “that won’t happen.”
How do you handle guest requests on the night? You want someone who takes the good ones and protects your brief from the ones that don’t fit.
Have you played at my venue before? Not essential, but local knowledge of acoustics and layout genuinely helps.
What’s included in your price? Hidden extras like travel, setup time, or equipment hire are a red flag.
The thing nobody says out loud
Your guests won’t remember the table centrepieces. They probably won’t remember the exact menu. But they will remember whether they had a brilliant time or spent the evening sitting down waiting for something to happen.
The entertainment is what people take home with them. Get it right and your wedding is the one everyone talks about. Get it wrong and the evening just sort of… ends.
It’s worth the research. It’s worth the questions. And it’s worth paying for someone who takes it as seriously as you do.
Thinking about booking?
I cover weddings across Newcastle, Durham, Sunderland, Middlesbrough, Teesside, York and the wider North East. If you’d like to chat about your day — no hard sell, just a conversation — get in touch.
📞 07717 380610 ✉ yourevent@alastairreay.co.uk Or view packages and prices